not cool things to say to your buddies

abuse , catholic , catholic divorce , communication , divorce , divorce recovery , friendship , narcissistic abuse , trauma recovery

Becoming Silent

Are people always telling you to be silent? Do you often speak without thinking and end up regretting what you’ve said? Would you just feel as if there’s too much noise on your head and want to learn how to turn it away? The fantastic thing is that anybody at all may be quiet — it just takes time and patience. If you want to know how to be silent,…

https://mzochim.wordpress.com/2019/07/15/2-ways-to-be-silent/

Listen to the Silence and Appreciate It

listening , persuasion , self-confidence , self-improvement , silence

Yuhakko　语학子

Our lives are filled with sounds. We are always surrounded with music, noises from the streets, sounds we make, etc.

For this reason we have all become unease with silence. We despise it, try to avoid it like the pest, and often end up filling it in whatever way possible to make it stop.

Why do we push it away so much though?

I believe the reason behind this is simply that it is a common habit we all have.

Habits can be great tools for improving ourselves but it can also be the cause of great troubles. Being an alcoholic is having a habit of drinking too regularly, smoking is a habit that can cause cancer, eating unhealthy food is a habit that can provoke many health-related problems.

In a similar way, not being comfortable with silence is a habit that causes troubles. Contrary to the above examples…

View original post 417 more words

How Important is it that We Listen?

Featured, Emily Polston, first person, listening, vow of silence

Unsatisfying conversations? One phrase can help

communication , listening , questions , understanding

Turning over pebbles

My client – let’s call him Pete – was telling me about his greatest current frustration.

‘I do a lot of my work on the phone. Too often, I get embroiled in small talk, the conversations seem to ramble on and at the end of it, I’m not really sure what the caller actually wanted.

‘Come to think of it, it happens face to face too sometimes. A colleague will arrive at my desk, chat for a few minutes, maybe ask a question or two and then drift off. I don’t want to seem unfriendly but neither do I want to waste our time.

I want to ask “why are you calling?” or “was there something specific you wanted?” but that sounds a bit rude.’

‘How is it when you’re the one making initial contact?’ I asked.

‘Actually, that’s a good point. Maybe I need to be clearer about the…

View original post 389 more words

Conversation Starters: What is your story?

Instead of asking my friends “how are you?”, I ask them “tell me a story.” This way, it eliminates a simple response of “fine” and starts hopefully a better conversation.

https://3psbyseeker.wordpress.com/2019/01/20/what-is-your-story/